Vi ska va dem vi vill vara, hellre nu än efteråt

I love getting on the bus in the morning and they´re playing "I´m gonna dance with somebody, dance with somebody, dance! Dance! Dance!" very loudly, and you wonder where the dancefloor went.
I love singing in the classroom in beautiful tunes with beautiful lyrics with beautifl friends. Love it when your classmates come in and they smile at you like you´re warming them up with the song! 
I love sitting in peace, reading the newspaper, undisturbed by the world that is outside.
I love laughing hysterically until your stomach aches and you´re choking on your tea and you start laughing even more!

Wow I found these pictures from our first year on Steg, amazing how much it feels like we have changed!

Love it when you´re walking on a dark street, listening to great music, and you believe you´re alone. So you start singing along with the music in your ears, louder and louder. Then you suddenly feel like you´re in a music video so you have to smile up at the visible stars and spin around! As you do that you see this guy walking, not far behind you and you fall abruptly silent! Then realising that there is nothing to be ashamed of, "I can sing anyway" and then you do. Keep on walking and singing, without a care in the world!

When I got home my sweet sister came and asked if I could help her with her english homework. I got so happy!

Then I became aware that I´m missed here, my other wonderful sister told me how much she misses me, how much we used to hang out och talk and sing! I love you, you will always be my best singing partner, you know that! Love!

This really turned out a peppy post indeed! Well I´m full of it, peppy talk and smiles! Tomorrow the worlds best grandmother turns 70! We are celebrating that with a big pang party! I´m running over there to help her prepare right after school! It´ll be so much fun! 
Love               Love                 Love              Love               Love                   Love                   Love 

Jag tror att livet just har börjat och det blir.. det blir vad jag gör det till

It´s redicoulously late to start blogging now, but I feel like I won´t be able to sleep if I don´t. I have had the most lovely day. I have listened to perfect music. It sometimes feel like they sing my feelings, have you felt like that too sometime? I love it, I just smile ´cause I know that I´m not alone feeling this.
Today I have been feeling like I´m in my own world. Just spinning around in circles to the music, singing loudly, cleaning up my room, trying on different clothes feeling like a princess at times. I feel like one now, sitting on my throne that is my bed, looking out over my very neat room that can represent my nowdays neat world, in a cosy light with a warm cup of tea, getting goosebumps all over my body to Melissa Horns´beyond beautiful, but very sad song "Kungsholmens Hamn".

I took a walk with Mihaela. We walked around for a bit and ended up by our first school, Parkhemsskolan. I almost felt like child, we remembered all our games we used to play on the schoolyard, we were especially skilled on a game called Lin. You throw a small ball as far as you can up a wall and then you jump over the ball as it hits the ground again. We had different jump-moves, we ruled that game! 
Next Sunday, we are going back all day to play! We are going to play all those games we used to play and we are going to feel like children again. Can´t wait for next Sunday! Sorry Micks, can´t upload the pictures, gonna try again tomorrow.

Pictures I do have are from Friday. Another day I look back at, smiling. We have had so many wonderful nights this summer, so many beauiful moments I´ll remember all my life. But I have got. to. start. taking. my. own. pictures! I´m so bad at it haha, so once again I´m gonna borrow some!

Sofias´picture of us, I really enjoyed having you with me love. So much more to come! ( )

Ammo, thank you beautiful, for all of it! ( )

Gee I just realised how many times I´ve said feel or feeling in this post, anyone know a substitute word, I think I could really use one... 
Love           Love            Love              Love             Love 

An ache in my body and regret on my mind

´the minute you settle for less than you deserve,
you get even less than you setteled for.´

´Never regret something that once made you smile.´

I have smiled so much this summer, I refuse to regrett any of it.

E se fosse per nostalgia

And so it all begins, again. How many years has it been, since the day you got your first homework? Oh you were so excited! I remember my first, I must have been six, we were supposed to figure out wich glass-can were largest: the tall but thin one or the short but fat one? Of course you thought the fat one was biggest, because it looked bigger obviously, gee how hard was that? It was easy and fun, you wanted more homework! Of course nothing is that simple in life, not even the easy-first-homework, it turned out that they were equally large! Everyone in the class, spare of the two know-it-all:s Forsberg and Manne, had reached the same conclusion as I, so it didn´t bother me that I´d been wrong.
So now, 13 years later, I sit once again with the first piece of homework, or actually yesterday was the first day, today however I have more than one, I have quite a few actually. Nothing particularly difficult, but all the same. It´s a promise also, that there is more to come.
Haha wow I didn´t mean this post to become so sentimental, ah well, hope your day´s been really good!    

All those dirty words that you said, did you mean them did you now?

"Hi, I´m not tired anymore, I´m out now, you wanna meet?"
"Oh, you know I wish could... But I really just don´t want to. I guess I´m just too tired."

Do you think this was mean? I´m just thinking some people just get what they have coming to them!
Moahahahaha (evil laughter echoing, reverberating off the walls!) Moahahaha!
Now the food in the kitchen is screaming my name, my poor infected nose is craving tea and my mind has it´s eyes on my beloved friends box!
Love to you all!

If one drink can make tonight slip your mind then you, should drink up so you can convince yourself that I´m cute

Hey all! The last days have been very eventful. Last tuesday I had my two Amandas and Matilda over for the ultimate girls night. There was an entire table covered in food, uncountable glasses of wine, lots and lots of personal talk, drinks and waterpipe in the pool. The next day we started school... Not that we were there to witness it, but we heard that it did haha. Instead we baked bread and watched Alice in Wonderland. Then it was babasonic on the timetable, to celebrate our last night of the holiday!

Since I´m terrible at taking pictures I let others do it for me, then I steal them from their blogs moahaha!
These are Ammos, .

Thursday was our first day in school. Though we all go theory this year, that day was filled with only music lessons, so that kinda´ encouraged my hopes for this year. Friday was less fun, the last lesson of the day: project. I found myself wondering what would happen if I just...  didn´t do this project thing. Wonder wonder..
The weekend was party and the balcony, balcony with a large B, it has become our refuge on the evenings when we get home at four in the morning, desperately craving tea and salt and food and talk, or when we simply didn´t feel like going out at all but needed to talk. Haha!
Today I have gotten a cold that is getting worse by the hour. I think it´s got something to do with me running yesterday. You know when you´ve been running up a steep hill, pushing yourself thinking that you can stop when you get to the top. Yeah well, just as I was going to stop, the sky opens up and pretty much falls down on top of me! In two seconds I was soaked through my clothes, oceans forming on the ground. I had to run at break-neck-speed all the way home, I looked like a drowned cat with a very red face!
Today Mihaela´s been here bigger part of the day, just hanging and talking, watching the chick flick 17 Again haha. I needed a day like this, a real Sunday.
Tomorrow it all starts for real, real lessons, a full school day, from 09.15 to 16.40. Wish me good luck,
it´s just the start of a tough year. Fun of course, but school-wise it´ll be tough. But I maintain the thought that we can get through it together, having loads of fun along the way.

Even though she doesn´t believe in love, he´s determined to call her "beloved"

Now I would like to tell you about last night! I woke up at 13.00pm, though I had originally panned to get up at 11, that didn´t work out particularly well... Me and Fanny left home at 15.38 and met Sofia on the bus and then went in to the city. All Time Low were to sign at the record store "Bengans". We were a bit chocked to see the queue outside but we lined up anyway. About two hours later we left Bengans, very happy indeed, with signed albums and a leg even and lots of great pictures of the oh so cute rockstars!
Guitarist Jack and drummer Ryan, so cute haha!
So incredibly cute and awesome vocalist Alex Glasgarth!
Drummer, singer and basist Zac!
My signed CD!
Then we went as fast as our legs would carry us to the subway and went to medis. If we had thought the first queue was long, this was simply ridiculous! The line never ended, it surrounded three whole sides of the Debaser building! But it was pretty quick anyway. Then what can I say, the show simply rocked! I loved every second of it. I got quite a lot of great pictures also, here are a few of them!
Klicka för att stänga bilden
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"Remembering Sunday" I had goosebumps all over when Alex Glasgarth pulled out his acoustic guitar and re-entered the stage alone. Everyone sang along to the beautiful ballad in a perfect, strong but somehow soft sorl. That was my favorite part by far and the moment I remember clearest.
Then, sweaty, tired, sweaty again and happily high on life we returned home.
Now I´m gonna take a shower hand then have breakfast. Scratch that part I said about it being to early for breakfast, hello world, I´m wide awake, now I want scrambled eggs and toast!

Leaning now into the breeze, remembering Sunday

Alright, thought I would start with sunday night. It was sunday night right? All days and nights are kind of blurrying together, hard to separate the events from one another and tell on witch night what happend, are you experiencing that too?
Anyway, I told you about my crazy Saturday night. Waking up at 14.30pm didn´t leave much of the day left, after a long breakfast and shower, Ammo and I got on the train at around six-ish and went home to Amanda for a really nice dinner, over witch we re-encountered the events of the past days, and she hers from gotland. Then we found peace and quiet calm at the beach where time seemed to stand perfectly still. The conversation did not, so much to say and events to go through by the details haha. Also we could clearly state what a fantastic summer we have had. It gives me so much hope to think that we made the summer become every bit as good as we dreamt it would be, back when we saw very little light and everything was so heavy. Knowing that, I am hopeful that we can make this coming, third and last year of school just as good as we want it too be! It´s in our own hands to make it good, we´ve got the power! (I say that with that cool screaming voice in that song, do you hear it too? I´VE GOT THE POWER!) Yeah!
Haha, well anyway, we sat there all night until it was time for us to go home and sleep again haha!
(Hope it´s ok I took this from your blog Ammo! haha)
Oh and also, Simon has been freakin´out over where he is, not finding the right place and everything, I have been helping with moral support, now someone is coming to pick him up to take him to the right place, it´s been making me worried haha, now it´s pretty funny again!

I´m too tired to go to sleep, tonight, and I´m to weak to follow dreams

Goodmorning! Hello world! Guess who has been awake since five-ish? That´s right me! I´m so tired I can hardly type but I am still. so. very. much. awake. Family left and woke me up, felt a bit lonely there for while and considered calling Mickis to see if she happened to be awake so I could annoy her, but then I thought better of it haha. Tried my best and hardest to fall asleep again but oh so in vain. Took out my ipod and started reading blogs and looking much too closely on my new schedule and then finally started reading Hayley Williams´ (of Pramore) many twitter posts. Realised I´d read her posts back to four days ago and finally stopped. She has got to write like a hundred posts a day that woman!
Anyways, I saw no point in staying in bed when I wouldn´t get any sleep anyway, and I was really, really hungry too! So now I´m sitting here with a cup of tea, listening to the birds outside who are twittering madly! I kinda´ envy my little dog who can sleep through anything! Haha!
Anyways, I started sending out shout-outs to everyone on my phone to see if anyone impossibly could be awake. To my surprise, someone was! Today my thoughts go with Simon, who has left this planet to pursue happiness and further education elsewhere! He seems really nervous! Good luck!
Also Bella starts school today, she also answered me, and it hit me that come thursday, I´ll be up and about this early frequently! My gosh, I haven´t seen 7.06am since the start of summer (unless you count when I was drunkenly going to bed at that very hour just two-tree (?) days ago). I don´t really think I like this hour anymore... as if I ever liked it though.
God I´m really hungry, but I don´t think I can eat just yet, it´s too early for food.
Well, now I´ve said all that. I got at least two other posts coming up in a few minutes, so stay tuned!
And when you wake up and read this, make sure too call me to make sure I haven´t finally given in to sleep in front of this computer! haha just kidding, hope this doesn´t bore you to tears!

You remember that time

Just woke up an hour ago, barely slept eight hours. In a blurry memory I remember dancing and drinking wine from 9 to three in the morning. Following the craziest thing we have ever done. Feeling the need for a footbath after dancing for six hours, we found ourselves on a boat, dipping our feet in the surprisingly warm water, with yet another glass of wine in our hands.
Then we completely lost our minds and agreed to drive out on open sea and take a night bath! Can´t believe we actually did it, but we did! It was the insanest thing we´ve ever done but it was wonderful and absolutely unforgettable! A priceless night!
Now, sitting in Ammos kitchen, almost wondering if last night wasn´t infact a dream. Rather still hungover we´re gonna make our way to either Amanda or vitan, totally depending on the weather.

I know you feel it too, these words get over-used

"Welcome to the real world, it sucks - you´re gonna love it!"
Monica Geller, Friends

Haha love it, so very very true!

It´s been so long since you said "I know what I want, what I want is right here with you"

"Ah girls night, always wondered what goes on there.."
"Haha oh really!"
"Yeah, it´s a mystery, you girls are a mystery.."
"Haha of course, part of our charm, but I don´t think we would be as mysterius if we didn´t always have to wonder what´s going on inside your heads."
"What? We´re not that complicated, we´re easy!"
"Oh you think so do you... try being us for a day and try figuring yourself out, then come back to me haha."

At least I can admit it, we are rather complicated at times.

Tegan and Sara have been rolling all day, their music makes me so happy! Soon, going in for a picknic with Ammo in "vitan". Best place for tea and waterpipe and talk!

Stop crying to the ocean, stop crying over me. Stop worrying over nothing, stop worrying over me

Been feeling a sort of tingling in my stomach all morning. Talking english with cute german-thaiwanian-columbian guy might be the reason for it, I think so..
Also, having one of your best friends back safely on earth again is good.
I wonder why it feels like everything touchable in my life is literally a big mess, everything pell-mell in a heap, impossible to disentangle. Wondering why that is, since everything else seems perfectly straightforward and understandable. With one year left of security, I feel like this is the place I wanna be in right now.
I don´t need to know what will happen after this year, the things we can´t see now will come, both inevitable and very much welcome things.
Long walks and talking can feel like you put your hands on a somewhat wrinkled white paper and smooth it out, making your vision a lot clearer. I´m thankful for those talks and walks.
Right now, a cup of tea, Tegan and Sara playing on my Spotify, their song "The Ocean" is beautiful and can make you cry on your best day, making you laugh at your tears spilling for their wonderful lyrics. That is the best pice of advice I´ll be able to give anyone today I think. Now I´m gonna go and rip apart my wardrobe, see what can be spared and what else funny I´ll find from the sixth grade, I stopped "designing" and sewing my clothes for a reason... haha!
Love to you all for being wonderful!

Close your eyes and make believe, this is where you wanna be

First opportunity in weeks to get some sun and new colour for me. I´m taking it! God I look like I´ve been hiding in Alaska or something all summer. Work and illness can do wonders to your skin...
Now it´s me and my music and my book! Oh so well deserved I think!

Life´s like an hourglass glued to the table

Change. There´s this thing about change. You can hate it, hate all forms of change. You can love it, be impatient with everything that stays the same way for a too long a period of time. Either way it´s necessary I think. Change something in your everyday life is vital to be happy with it, not get bored with your day to day life. I used to change a lot before. I suppose I was so comfortable and secure in my surroundings and life that I felt perfectly confident to make changes to my hair and style and look. Then as time went and it became time to leave security and change environment all I wanted was to blend in as well as I could. Sometimes I believe that was a mistake, as I realised I didn´t blend in the way I wanted to I became insecure instead and rather drawn back. It came to me that I havn´t done any change to my hair in over two years. I became severely impatient with it. Pretty much all I saw was a grey mess, rat coloured I liked to call it. Now however (moahaha) it´s brown. Rather darker than I would have anticipated and it´s gonna take some getting used to...
Very small change, all in all. But I like it.
But now, as the new and last schoolstart approaches I´m hopeful that the new and last school year will differ a lot from previous years. The greatest change I think it will bring is the way I will feel. I´m gonna keep my head this time, feel healthier and more confident. Because I remember myself this time of year last year. I was nervous for the schoolstart instead of now when I actually feel rather excited at times. Confident that even if it will be a though year I will go through it with people I know will support me and whom I will support. There will be lots and lots of laughter and fun. Trips to places where you get a change of scenery and find new experiences. That I am excited about.
So change is important! Use it. Embrace it. Like it and live with it as a natural part of life.

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